- Several Dating Sites Get Purchased
I'm not sure how these purchases will filter down to its user bases, but there were some major deals brokered in the online dating world recently. Match.com purchased SinglesNet, and private equity firm Great Hill Partners LLC has made an offer to buy Spark Networks (who owns a myriad of sites including SingleParentsMingle, and American Singles).
For those of you who belong to one of these dating sites, are you worried that the services you've gotten used to will change, or are you happy and hopeful it will lead to a better online dating experience?
More information:
Several Dating Sites Get Purchased originally appeared on About.com Dating on Wednesday, March 10th, 2010 at 21:37:52.
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- Is What I Find Attractive Weird?
Becca asks: "While we were at the mall, a girlfriend of mine asked me if I found guys with hair on their chests attractive. I said no because I grew up swimming competitively, so I'm not used to seeing guys with hair on their chests. But I love it when a guy smells like chlorine (again, the swimming thing) and said so. My friend looked at me like I was crazy so I stopped talking. Is what I find attractive really that weird?"
No Becca, that's not weird at all. We've all got something unusual that we can appreciate, just like we all have something unusual to offer. For me, its men with goatees. I realize that few women appreciate a man with facial hair, but for me, goatees are one of the easiest ways to get my attention.
I wouldn't worry too much about what your friend thinks regarding what you find attractive. She's likely to have something in her personal list that drives her wild but makes you go 'ick' in response too. In the grand scheme of life, if what you find attractive doesn't hurt you/someone else or break any laws, I see no harm in finding things out of the ordinary attractive. In fact, I think its a good thing - because if we all appreciated the same things, life would be pretty boring.
But what about you? What do you find attractive that might not be considered normal?
Is What I Find Attractive Weird? originally appeared on About.com Dating on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 01:41:39.
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- Dating Question About Older Men, Younger Women
Chloe asks: "I'm 18 and my boyfriend is 31. He's ready to start a family with me, but I feel like I'm too young to even start thinking about having kids. I'm flattered that he wants me as the mother of his children but the thought scares me too. He's the only guy I've ever dated, and I really care about him a lot. How do I tell him I'm not ready for kids without him breaking up with me over it?"
What concerns me most about your question Chloe is the older man aspect of your equation. You probably already know, but dating someone who is thirteen years older than you at this stage of your life is a challenge at the best of times. He's ready to settle down and you aren't. He's already learned how to be independent and live as an adult, whereas you're just getting started - and may still be finishing high school. Basically, your goals and aspirations aren't going to jive with your boyfriends'.
This might be difficult to hear, and I realize its not what you're asking, but you need to tell him that you're not ready to have kids yet and prepare yourself for the relationship ending because of it. This isn't your time to start a family, and from what you've said, that won't change anytime soon. If he's dead set on having kids ASAP, then it might be best for both of you if things ended now.
Related: Relationship Expectations, Will Our Relationship Last Quiz, Communication Skills Quiz for Couples, Should We Take This Relationship To The Next Level or End It?
Dating Question About Older Men, Younger Women originally appeared on About.com Dating on Sunday, February 28th, 2010 at 00:10:44.
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- What Was Your Best Date Ever?
Have you ever had a date that you knew you'd never forget, no matter what happened with the relationship? One that took your breath away, one that made you giggle, or one that just plain made you feel great?
I've heard some dating disaster doozies, and a lot of love stories that made my heart swell. But what I'm after are those dates that will go down in your personal history as one of the best dates of all time - and I'd love to know why said date was so amazing. Did you share great chemistry, or did the words just flow like with no one else? Was it a first date, or was it with someone you'd been dating for years? Were any intimacies exchanged, or was it more lighthearted and and carefree? Did you share your first kiss on the date, or did you do something else - or nothing at all?
I'd like to collect a huge database of the best dates ever, so that other singles and dating couples can read through the list, get inspired, try some of the great date ideas themselves, and report back how their amazing date fared. So don't be shy and share your good date stories - and maybe even win the reader story of the week.
What Was Your Best Date Ever? originally appeared on About.com Dating on Wednesday, February 24th, 2010 at 02:06:51.
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- He Tells Me What I'm 'Doing Wrong' Well After I Do It. What Now?
Issa asks: "I've been dating a gentleman for about 6 weeks now (6 dates...1 per weekend). Major bump in the relationship this weekend. While driving me home, he asked me what I wanted from a relationship and I said someone kind and respectful. Up until just a few days ago, he had been very respectful, but it seems like everything has changed now and I'm very, very confused. I said I liked relaxing together and sitting on the porch and just being comfortable. I then asked him what he wanted and, all of a sudden, I get a list of about four things that I'm doing wrong or things he doesn't like. And, three of them began with, well "Julie" used to do this (of course, that is the previous girlfriend). One of the things he listed is what my question is about.
Theirs had been a long distance relationship and I guess she always drove to see him. Out of the 6 dates, he's driven 5 of those times, but I had no idea he minded this. He said that wasn't really fair to him. My question is, are women supposed to drive half of the time?
The history is I'm in my 40s, a new school teacher (3rd year) and have been divorced for 2 1/2 years after being married for 18. He is a manager at a bank. He has never been married and told me that he dated a woman for 14 years, but only saw her maybe every couple of months. He also said that he likes a clean house (I do have quite a bit of clutter) and even said negative things about his sister's house being dirty. We met at a Panera shop once and when it was time to leave, I had kissed his neck and ear. He told me tonight that he does not really like public displays of affection (even though he said he liked it when it was happening). Is the woman really supposed to drive half of the time? I just feel really weird about everything that has happened with this gentleman this evening
."
Hi Issa. I'd drop this guy like a hot potato if I were you. Not only is he telling you after the fact what he likes and dislikes, he's giving you several large red flags all at once: he mostly dates women casually (seeing them once every couple of months for years on end), doesn't commit, and sees women only as providers to him, catering to his every need - not a two way street. Sure, differences in opinion regarding PDAs and cleanliness are potential issues. At the very least they are discussion points, ways to see if you're on the same page, and an opportunity to connect with one another. In my opinion, the two of you aren't connecting, nor are you wanting the same things.
I realize I haven't addressed your main question - should women drive half the time - because to me the question is moot. I don't think that you driving half the time is the issue. But so that I don't look like I'm not answering your question? I think it depends on the relationship. I've never heard of who drives where being an issue (in several thousand dating questions received throughout the years) unless it was a long distance relationship. In that case, its polite to switch things up and take turns, but finances and family commitments can take precedence. In my experience, people who live close to one another rarely have this discussion; folks usually want to see each other however they can in the early stages of a relationship, so who drives whom rarely comes up (again, unless there are kids and/or one person makes a lot more money than the other).
I'd let the gent know kindly and quickly that things aren't working out for you and move on. After six dates I don't feel that you need to do this in person, and frankly I wouldn't recommend it. My hunch is that a respectful response won't be forthcoming, based on what you've shared already. So the next time he calls, let him know you're busy and think it would be best if the two of you didn't see each other anymore. And if he doesn't call again? Problem solved.
He Tells Me What I'm 'Doing Wrong' Well After I Do It. What Now? originally appeared on About.com Dating on Sunday, February 21st, 2010 at 12:50:55.
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